Acceptable ambition

In this society, there are certain life ambitions that are acceptable. Well, not just acceptable, but encouraged, demanded, required to be stated and bragged about, even: the ambition to complete college (or various advanced degrees thereafter); the ambition to enter a career field; the ambition to move up at work; the ambition to start a business, or buy a vacation home, or upgrade to a more reliable or fancier vehicle... the list goes on. If you lack ambition in any of these areas, if you aren't passionate about accomplishing them, or even just not passionate about talking about those goals, you are somehow seen as not participating fully in society-- you are somehow forfeiting your claim on your little share of the American Dream.

But other ambitions are less socially acceptable. For instance, while starting your own business or making partner at the firm are admirable ambitions, saying you want to get married or have a family are much less so. They are seen as misguided at best, desperate at worst.

But, screw it. I want these things.

So why is it less acceptable to say that?

These desires are no less Biblical. Maybe they are more ok to state in the church? But, still... from my observation, they have a similar stigma, just to less degree, perhaps. These desires are just less "cool" by society's standards-- a society in which we are all supposed to be independent, driven, and self-sufficient-- while women are simultaneously denigrated if unable to "get a man."

...That paradox is a whole 'nother can of worms. But it is not the particular one I am pondering today. The one I am pondering today is the one that says it is not only ok, but admirable, to pursue ambitions which may even be to the detriment of others (depending on your business practices, the economic and environmental impact of the homes or vehicles you seek, etc.). But that's another aspect of our society-- the "dog-eat-dog world" ethic, in which those practices are all ok. But seeking love? Not so much.

So maybe somebody needs to start by saying it's ok. If I have to be the first one in the entire world to outright state it (though I don't think, and I'm really hoping, I'm not the very first one), so be it: I want a husband, and a family. I would like to find someone to do life with, before I'm so old that I have to rush to have babies while it's still reasonably healthy to do so. And that has not a thing to do with any fact that I don't have a full life now-- I have school, and an enjoyable job, and really fantastic friends, and am involved in church, and actually really enjoy the freedom that being single allows me at this time. I like decorating my own home and letting the cat crawl up under my neck as I'm watching TV and eating tortilla chips in the evening (more on this general satisfaction with current man-less-ness, probably to come in another post in the near future. But my life being generally awesome does not mean that it is how I wish things to be forever. And that is ok, dammit. Regardless of what anyone else may think of that ambition.